Dateline: Sambodia (Sousaphone Nous)

Coelba to raise $350 million with Baa notes sold abroad, according to the news service Sousaphone Semealogy.

This report on a fairly banal corporate finance transaction, rendered on a butt-ugly wiki page, nevertheless represents something of a breakthrough for our R&D efforts here at the Sousaphone in the area of semantic wikis.

A stochastic twinkie wha?

Basically, publishing information this way means that when Acme sells its jet-powered roller skate division to Yoyodyne, your lead is not “Acme sells division to Yoyodyne” but rather “cash-strapped Macrohard spinoff unloads very profitable division to subsidiary of the rival Orange Group to meet short-term debt requirements.”

I am not the tubist I once was, but I am, in fact, Colin Brayton, the cash-strapped Van Gogh of tubism.

One of the things I waa very proud of was creating  form that holds all the reasons for which a company has to file a Form 8-K.

In the future, supersleek Semealogy, the user will select this quickly from a dropdown box rather than from a grungy radio button.

In any event, my dream is coming true: I, the journalist, will be replaced by some form filler-inner in some Southeast Asian click farm and be hailed the future of Journalism 2.0 by Bill and Melinda Gates — who somehow managed to convince us there was something fundamentally wrong with the first edition.

Its principal vice was that it printed articles critical of Bill and Melinda, the latter a director of the Washington Post,  as far as I can tell.

At any rate, Sousaphone fans, at some point it might even become useful to subscribe to the Atom syndication feed to keep abreast of Sambodian events as they happen. CPFL and Ersa are working on a merger in their sustainable fuels divisions, for example. Whoopee. Knock yourself out.