Dateline: Sambodia (Sousaphone Nous)

Coelba to raise $350 million with Baa notes sold abroad, according to the news service Sousaphone Semealogy.

This report on a fairly banal corporate finance transaction, rendered on a butt-ugly wiki page, nevertheless represents something of a breakthrough for our R&D efforts here at the Sousaphone in the area of semantic wikis.

A stochastic twinkie wha?

Basically, publishing information this way means that when Acme sells its jet-powered roller skate division to Yoyodyne, your lead is not “Acme sells division to Yoyodyne” but rather “cash-strapped Macrohard spinoff unloads very profitable division to subsidiary of the rival Orange Group to meet short-term debt requirements.”

I am not the tubist I once was, but I am, in fact, Colin Brayton, the cash-strapped Van Gogh of tubism.